As you have probably noticed self improvement has become a reoccurring theme with many of my blog posts. To that end, another aspect I need to work on is expressing my gratitude. Due in no small part of my own negative tendencies, I rarely actually get around to showing how grateful I am. One incident that really showed this to me was my stream the other week. After struggling with tech issues for the week my stream ended up on the slower side, and ultimately had to end early because of more tech issues. The result of this was my becoming overly emotional and negative. I claimed that I should just quit streaming and that I felt like no one really cared. This was of course all said in the heat of the moment, but is no less problematic because of that.
The reality is people do care, and I do appreciate that. However, I fail at truly expressing it more often than not. I understand that I was emotional at the time, but it was still wrong to be so ungrateful. And it’s wrong that I don’t tell those in my life how grateful I am more often. To those that support my stream. Those that support my writing. My husband and his patience with me, for being my rock, and helping me to pursue my goals and dreams. My friends and their understanding that I am often not the best friend in the world. All of those in my life.
The truth is it’s not enough to simply know that I am grateful, I need to start expressing that. Working on being more positive for myself is good (and something I need), but I need to project that to others as well. To not allow my emotional outbursts make me dismissive to those that support me. Beyond that to also make sure that I take the time to say thank you more, to let people know I appreciate them, and to express the gratitude that I have.
I am a writer and streamer by trade. A gamer, reader, and all around nerd by hobby ;)